Friday, July 20, 2012

Down the rabbit hole

I'm relatively sure that I will someday have to answer for killing my husband. Not in the typical "Snapped" sort of way, but every time I fix him something to eat or drink in the manner he's accustomed, I'm sure that I will one day have to answer to some higher authority on the way it's been prepared.


I catch myself daydreaming, arguing in my own defense, as I stir his Koolaid.
"I swear, if I didn't add this much sugar, he'd go behind me and do it himself! I'm just saving us both the hassle! I've tried to get him to cut back! Yes, yes, same with the butter. I know! Well I did pick him up that carton of cigarettes, but only because I had the coupon. He always forgets the dang coupons."

But I'm going to have to come to grips with the fact that I'm an accessory to his self-destructive habits. An enabler. Bleh. That leaves a nasty taste in one's mouth. Better tasting than "nag," though. I'd rather help someone nail their coffin faster and enjoy the time together, than just sit back and watch them do it on their own and complain about it. To me, I guess, that's worse. 

Accepting a person for everything they choose to be is something I need to practice since I am raising the world's most stubborn two year old, who will have the title of world's most stubborn teenager before I know it. With a child, however, I refuse to be a pushover. It is MY JOB to mold her into the most self-sufficient adult I can manage, and I do not take that responsibility lightly. I'm also determined to be as non-judgmental as possible, and that will take some work on my part. 

So here is my journey. Part passive, part aggressive housewife and stay at home mother of one. I'm learning how to be a good wife, a good mom, a good cook, and still maintain some semblance of a pretty woman. So what you'll see here will probably be an eclectic little combination of charming anecdotes, cheap, successful recipes with as much nutrition as I can muster, griping and ranting, fun activities my daughter enjoys, and homemade beauty tips that I'm giving a go to stay within my meager beauty budget.  

4 comments:

  1. Just a thought, on the koolaide, have you tried to put too much one time, I mean really too much like syrup, and he will be disgusted with the sweetness and ask you to cut back, ha ha
    Just my opinion, on the smokes but, if you smoke them you GO buy them. No one should expect that from anyone. You are his wife, not slave. As I said just my opinion. Take it or leave it.

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  2. Funny how you say and do,then it happens to you,. I sweetened the tea too much

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  3. Hehehe, I do need to try that. And my opinion has ALWAYS been, to not help support any bad habits. But somehow, over time, I was gradually talked into doing it. Buncha baloney. And I don't know how it happened.

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  4. Believe me it happens and to all of us. Too many times to me, so you have my sympathy. Guess it comes with age to set strict limits, also comes with knowing what really is a wife's job. Like with all jobs they throw in extras, without pay.

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